I only want her
by Pandora3
Summary: Cho's thoughts on Hermione...George/Hr implied! (That might change though... ;) ) Please, R/R; this is one of my early fics I found again.


@I only want her…@  
  
(1/1)  
  
By: Pandora  
  
Category: Romance/Angst  
  
Rating: PG-13? (I'm not really good at rating so…judge yourself!)  
  
Summary: This is Cho's thoughts on Hermione, exactly why she loves her…I also have warning for you out there who doesn't like slash: Press the back button immediately! This is fem-slash, and it will probably just have this one chapter (Unless someone doesn't want a continuation!)  
  
Authors Note: I don't have that much to say right now, except that I don't think that slash is "sick" and "twisted". I think it's perfectly sane. I mean, does it really matter if it's two boys, or two girls, as long as they love each other? Also, this is not just something about two girls who's in love, this is a story of true and pure love. Now, I must add that I am not a lesbian, but I still don't mind them. So, any of you out there who's suffering from people not being able to accept this sort of things, be strong!  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing, neither do you, I do own this plot though, so you can't sue! (silly, huh?)  
  
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Hermione. Hermione…Granger. Oh god, how I hate that name, hate that girl. I hate her, because she's everything I could never be. Has everything I could never have. Is so much better than I could never even dream of being. I hate her, because she's constantly in my dreams, my mind, always there. Never departing, never leaving, always there. Sometimes, if I try really hard and concentrate, I can almost go through a whole day without thinking of her. Almost be like I used to be, almost free of the curse, the curse who is also known as Hermione Granger. But only almost. I can never be completely free, never. Even if I think I finally got rid of her, I see something that reminds me, and "one-two-three", she's there again. Tormenting me. Always in the back of my mind, always nudging my thoughts in the direction of her. My memories of her. The first time I saw her, when she was new and got sorted into Gryffindor, I just didn't care. She was just another face, another name among the ones in the crowd. No one important, not like me. Then, in fourth year, at the Yule ball, I saw her and Victor Krum. And it was as if I had seen her for the first time. I just kept thinking to myself, wondering where the "old" Hermione went, and who this person was. And oddly enough, the sight of her and Krum made my blood boil, and my stomach hurt. After that, I suddenly became almost…obsessed, with her. I could talk with my friends, and suddenly, she walked past, and I would…zoom out, just standing there. Even in the biggest crowd, I would immediately notice her, then walking past her, trying to pass so closely I could without being suspicious, only to be able to get a whiff of her hair, which smelled like lemon. I would go out of my way in the mornings, just for the chance to "accidentally" bump into her. To see those chocolate eyes, that was barely visible behind her stack of books. All these "accidental" meetings were, of course, as detailed and planned it can be. Then, I started observing her, putting mental notes to myself, and almost every evening I would go through what I knew about her, and what I had yet to find out. About her, Hermione…Granger. I, of course, would never ask anything right out, I would just discreetly listen to a conversation between the famous musketeers, or overhear someone else. It seemed that every time that her name was on somebody else's lips, I would immediately hear, no matter how far off I was. Eavesdropping at others, can sometimes be good, but in the end it's no use. The things you hear will eventually hurt you, someday. But by doing this, I of course heard all the rumours circulating about Hermione around the school. And boy, are they many! My mind actually wanted to believe in them, just so I could convince myself that she wasn't an angel or something like that. But my heart refused to work with me, it had found my "love of life", for me, and wasn't going to let her go. My friends noticed my strange little habits, but they never mentioned it since they though it was HARRY I was finding out things about, observing. They all thought it was him, I was trying to get close. I think it was about then I finally admitted to myself that I had a crush on her. No, I even was in love with her. It didn't feel strange to be in love with a girl, what felt strange, was that the girl was Hermione Granger! Back then, I had no idea what I would do, how to make her like me back. I don't know now either. The only thing I know is that I HAVE to have her, I can't keep this masquerade up any longer. I'm in sixth year now, and still feels sick every time I see her with her "boyfriend", George Weasley. Oh, how I hate him. He, who took the only person I ever wanted. He, who probably don't even see her, as she deserves. As I se her. When I look at her, I don't see an "ordinary" girl, not that she could ever be ordinary. No, when I look at her, I see…perfection. A spirit, so free and beautiful, it's just…amazing. I see…a goddess, a mirror-image of the things that is held in the highest regards among us humans. Her skin is like the moons pale surface, her eyes, which by the way is deep chocolate brown, twinkles as if the stars were living in them, and on the inside she's like the sun. She draws everyone to her, either as friends, or foes. I could go on and on about her for hours, but a little sound that comes from around the corner, draws my attention, and I sneak up to look. And of course, there she is. She's walking quietly down the hall, she's nearing me. She's so beautiful, where she walks. The moon shines in through the big windows, making shadows dance across her face as she moves. My heart skips a beat every now and then. Is it just my eyes, or isn't she wearing a dress made of moonbeams? Isn't it the suns own light that shines around her? Isn't the wind following her, making her hair move slightly? And isn't the stars themselves there, twirling and spinning, dancing around her? Oh, how I wished to be one of those stars, those moonbeams, that sunlight, the wind, slowly twinning around her! Oh, if only I could be one of her companions, if only to just be near her. It doesn't matter that she doesn't see them, that no one else see her like that, it doesn't matter. As long as I do it, nothing else matters. She sees me now, and for a second, I almost think that her face lights up. But that must be my imagination, right?  
  
"Hello, Cho. What are you doing out here?" To me, her voice is angelic. Just pure and beautiful, like small silver bells. I only stand there dumbly, not knowing what to say, what to do. Suddenly, I walk up to her, take her head in my hands, and kiss her. Just kiss her, showing all the passion and love I have inside. Showing what I feel on the inside, showing what I feel for her, and only her.  
  
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Well, I'm done! And I actually think that it was quite good, mind you. Please review! Cheers, and Ja Ne! (I can't decide on which one to use!)  
  
//Pandora 


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